Monday, April 27, 2009

Crazy Love: Not What Van Morrison Sang About

...love, love, love, crazy love....---Van Morrison (Crazy Love)

I just recently finished reading a book titled Crazy Love by Leslie Morgan Steiner. Unlike the lyrics singer Van Morrison evoked of "smitten" love in his classic song of the same title, Steiner writes a book about her own descent into infatuation turned violent. It is an account of her relationship and marriage to an abusive man. I could relate....a little.

Steiner's often brutal account of her relationship then marriage (the guy's name is disguised, but the tale of Steiner's account is all too real) to an abusive person is troubling, but worth reading if only to educate people who don't understand the dynamics of abusive relationships.

While I was in college in my early twenties, I was involved in two abusive relationships. I wasn't stupid, I thought I was in love, and fortunately, I guess, the "abuse" was emotional not physical. It was related to self-esteem issues. A common thread in such relationships I'd find out. Even if you start out "smart," love can change your perspective.

I later worked at an abused women's shelter and saw and heard situations much worse than what I had experienced, even though I had also been stalked for several months in the days before stalking was labeled a crime.

I recommend the book with hesitancy. It is painful to read at times, but if you don't know that much about abusive relationships, it will definitely make you aware of how relationships that seem so "perfect" can be so harmful...and sometimes deadly.

Last word...Steiner obviously survived her abusive situation to write this book as a cautionary tale for others who sometimes are "crazy in love." As the saying goes: "Knowledge is power."

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